Toxic Relationships: How to Heal and When to Let Go

Boy meets girl.  They go out.  They fall in love.  They live together and live happily ever after.  This is the kind of stuff we read in books, watch in movies or on TV.  But is this reality?  Instead, this is what we commonly find happening:  Boy meets girl.  They go out.  They fall in love.  They live together.  They discover who each person really is.  They develop a toxic relationship.  Abuse happens.  The relationship ends.

Unhealthy attitudes and habits creep in slowly in relationships.  You only get to realize that something is terribly wrong after some years and you don’t even remember when it started.  You realize the person you fell in love with has turned into someone you don’t know anymore; a stranger who makes you think and believe that you are not good enough and you can never do anything right, a creature who constantly makes you feel anxious, fearful and threatened.

A toxic relationship is characterized by one partner, persistently degrading and damaging the other’s emotional and/or physical state.   The key words in this destructive pattern are always, constantly, daily and continually.  The harmful acts are done to the other in such frequency that results to the loss of respect, compassion, protection, security, support, sharing and care in the relationship.  This routine makes the victim lose self-esteem and is drained both physically and emotionally.

(For generalization purposes, I will be using the term him to refer to either a male or female.)

If you no longer feel empowered, inspired, comfortable and safe in your relationship, try to check if your partner has any of the following traits or habits because you could already be in a toxic relationship:

  1.  Makes you feel guilty of many failures.  This could be done subtly and not directly but this partner constantly says things that make you blame yourself and make you believe that you caused whatever it is that is not going well.  When done directly, this partner will blatantly finger point at you and blame you out front without him taking any responsibility for anything.
  1.  Grumpy and Displays bad temper.  You never get to wake up without feeling nervous if your partner is in a bad mood again for no reason at all.  This partner easily gets irritated and angry for the smallest bit of things or for no apparent cause at all. Tantrum and anger bursts cause you constant fear.
  1.  Over-Dependence. Your partner has no desire to show any effort of taking on responsibilities.  You are always in the front-line for decision making.  Finding solutions for almost every problem is all placed on your shoulders alone.  This could also involve financial dependence on your side. This partner relies on you for everything.  You may even be threatened with a suicide if you are not there for him.  He appears so weak (even if he is not sick) and needy that his presence alone drains you of any remaining energy you have left.
  1.  Belittling or correcting and name calling. It seems like all your moves lead to a losing dead end in the eyes of your partner. Your words are constantly corrected for grammar or mispronunciation.  Your style of hair or clothing is always insulted.   Your accomplishments are never good enough. Even your physical features are ridiculed or made fun at. He coins you with names, characters and tags that demean you as a human being. This is done when in public or when you are both alone.
  1. Dictatorship.  Freedom and comfort have lost their meaning in the presence of this partner.  All your moves are well guarded and demanded by the other. You are not allowed to speak your mind or bargain for some allowance.   Words you say,  your brand of clothing,  who your friends ought to be, what to eat, where you can go, what to engage in, or any other personal choices are all regulated and chosen by this kind of partner.
  1. Superiority Complex.  This partner feels so high and mighty and sees you only as a subordinate and not a partner.  A follower and not a mate.  A power struggle is very evident in your conversations and this partner will never let you win. The debates may seem endless and cause emotional drain on your part.  He makes you feel you can never be his co-equal.  He will say things that make you question your abilities  and achievements which result to you resigning to the notion that you can never be at equal standing with him. The concept of apology is usually absent with these types of partners.
  1. Interrupts you.  You never get to finish what you are saying with this person.  He always cuts you off in the beginning or middle of what you are saying.  He preempts what you want to express.  He enjoys hearing his voice and not what you want to say.
  1.  Uses you.  This partner gets to be very nice and caring only when he needs something from you. He makes you feel that it is your responsibility to keep serving his needs and wants.  His constant demand of certain favors or services indirectly feeds you the notion that if you are no longer useful to him, he will get angry and leave.
  1.  Breaks Promises.  There is no such thing as a word of honor for such partners.  They always make you hope for things they never fulfill.  They say flowery words to keep you believing in the “promises” but there is no effort seen on their side to fulfill what was pledged.
  1. Overly Possessive or being obsessed. Partners of this type tend to be religiously jealous of almost anything that comes between you and him.  You will not be allowed to go out with anyone unless he comes along.  You will even get into deep trouble if you merely look at someone else. He does not allow you freedom and space away from him.  You are monitored through constant calls and text messaging. You are required to build your world around him.  He will make sure you remember that he will never allow you to be free of him, ever.
  1. Complaining and Discontentment.  This person has nothing to say but all the woes he has in his life.  He constantly verbalizes lines that refer to things that don’t make him happy.  He never sees the good things you do but only sees the things you can’t and don’t give him.  He is never contented but always whines about things he dreams of and things he never gets to achieve.  You can never console and please this person enough.
  1. Stalking and Nosy.  These partners follow you around or check all your social media sites.  They investigate on all your affairs. They always ask other people about your activities and whereabouts when you are not together.  Your cellphones and other gadgets are not safe from his prying eyes. He will even track you down with your phone. Privacy is taboo with this toxic partner.  Your words are never enough and he will make sure he noses around enough to know anything else about you.

Again, the above negativities may only be considered toxic if they are done to you on a regular basis.  No one is truly perfect while in this dimension and so we must leave some space for occasional misgivings by our partner.  Remember that you might have also been guilty of any of the above at one point in your relationship.

Toxic partners are highly cunning.  In public or in front of friends or relatives, they act in almost untarnished ways.  Their exemplary personalities will never give anyone an inkling on who they really are inside.  They manipulate and control their partners and cause all sorts of damage behind the scenes.  These kinds of partners are also labelled as energy vampires who perform their nasty feedings in secret. They find pleasure on draining their mate of all remaining dignity and self-worth.

People who are prone to toxic relationships:

>  Suffered trauma or abuse in childhood

>  Adolescents

>  People with low self-image and low self-esteem

>  People who previously survived a failed relationship

>  People who are from broken or dysfunctional families

>  Women from highly religious denominations

>  Light workers and empaths

People who survived extensive traumas, separation from former loved ones and those who came from broken relationships have the tendency to look for someone they can depend on or cling to, no matter what the price.  Because they have lost so much of themselves to whatever past pain they experienced (this involved soul fragmentation), they are left lacking and needy.  They tend to hook up with a “stronger” person whom they think will be their savior, only to find out in the end that they dug a deeper grave for themselves.   They will cling to this partner even if they are being abused, fearing themselves ending up being left behind and abandoned again.  The fear of being alone is their motivating force to stay abused.

People who are obese, have certain deformities or language impediments are also very easy prey for toxic partners.  They have very low self-esteem and believe themselves so ugly and deformed.  Even if they know that their mates are already abusing them, they stay and submit, thinking no one will ever lay eyes on them anymore if their current relationship ends.  Whatever little self-respect and self-worth they had before entering such toxic coupling has been drained to nothingness.

Many adolescents allow themselves into toxic relationships out of peer pressure, wanting to belong, desiring to be cool and famous, fearing rejection and because of parental rebellion or parental abuse.

Women who belong to very religious sects are usually victims of such relationships.  Many Christian women are.  They are taught and expected to comply with the biblical teaching, “What God has joined together, no man must put asunder.”  They suffer and stay in their marriage fearing that God will punish them if they don’t keep their vows.  They will allow their spouse to abuse them and disempower them until the end.

Light workers, particularly empaths, are stoic victims of such relationships.  Because they operate highly on their heart chakras (which deal on the love frequency), they are born with the built-in mechanism to keep on forgiving and to heal everyone with love. They love others so much that they will not mind themselves being damaged. They feel that it is their responsibility to change the destructive patterns of their partners.  They stay patient and enduring through years and years of abuse because they believe in giving their loved one a million chances to change for the best.  Also, they easily feel guilty. Their spiritual check and balance is always on high alert to make sure they are not hurting anyone. Because of this,  they will go to the extent of blaming themselves thinking, they have done something which turned their partner to be so manipulative.  Their guilt will drive them to believe that leaving the relationship will mean that they are bad people who did not love enough or persevere at all.

If you are in a toxic relationship, you should never feel responsible for your partner’s cruelty.  Do not be afraid of being alone because the universe will never abandon you. You are loved and cared for by beings you cannot see.  If you only ask, they will be more than eager to give you the help and right company you need and deserve.   Do not be afraid of being wrong.  What your toxic partner is doing to you is what’s wrong and not you.  If you decide to end such a relationship, you should never feel ashamed or guilty because this only means that you are loving yourself first.  You can never give what you don’t have.  You can’t love and find the right love if you don’t love yourself first, in the right way.  Love is never abusing another.  Manipulation and control are tactics of selfishness, not love.  No one can hurt you unless you allow it.

Don’t ever think that allowing your partner to drain and disempower you is a way of loving.  Giving permission to this person to abuse you helps him become the worst he can be.  You are not even helping this person spiritually because you are allowing him to create more bad karma for himself.

While in their early stages, toxic relationships can still be mended.  Talking calmly with your partner and expressing how his acts affect you may help him realize his mistakes.  Also be keen at pointing out how you wish to be treated.  Do this in a time when both of you are relaxed and stress free.  Ask help from the Source and your invisible guardians to assist you in doing this.  After an agreement is made, give your partner time and room to change and help him change. Do your part. Remember that you cannot control your partner to change but you can change yourself.  Act and speak in ways that will not allow your partner to hurt or abuse you.  If nothing happens, seek counselling.  A non-biased, reliable and credible third party counselor may greatly help in healing wounded relationships.

If your partner does not change after calmly pointing out his abusive or degrading habits, and counselling has failed, here is a spiritual technique you can try to help save your relationship:

The Realization Shield and Love Bubble

When you are alone, allow yourself to be completely covered and protected by a mirror shield. Program this shield to protect you from your partner’s toxic advances.  Let the mirror be very powerful in making him see himself and all the wrong he is doing to you.  Ordain your mirror to deflect the negative effects of his acts and make him experience for himself how he makes you feel.  Allow the energy from your shield to emit a pinkish light on him.  This is love energy.  Ask this energy to heal him of whatever may be causing his toxic patterns.  Allow this light to make him realize his mistakes and admit them.

Next, remember that we attract what we think and feel.  If you daily visualize your partner being very nice, kind and supportive to you, you will notice subtle changes in the next few days.  You will see that your partner will start acting in better ways. Events will be attracted that will help make him realize his mistakes.

Strongly visualize the harmonious and cooperative relationship you want for both of you.  Keep doing this and avoid thinking of your partner’s negative traits. Put these good thoughts in a giant bubble and step inside it.  Spiritually imagine pulling your mate inside the bubble. Keep holding each other’s hand.  Clearly visualize you both locked in that bubble of love, healing and bliss.  If you can bear a few more months and keep doing this spiritual exercise with enough desire, you will be amazed at how your relationship can heal.

Letting go:

Where physical violence and substance abuse are involved, it is very difficult or impossible to fix whatever relationship is left.  Physically hurting a partner and taking drugs are vicious habits that are very hard to rehabilitate.

In cases where the relationship is beyond repair after much effort, you must let go. Do not let the number of years you’ve been together or the few happy memories let you stay abused.

If you have children and they are your reason for staying, do not feel hindered because you are only saving yourself and your kids from further damage.  Children who grow up seeing their parents treating each other wrongly usually exhibit such detrimental patterns in their future relationships.  They will subconsciously adapt and believe that this is the norm and there is nothing wrong with it. Help yourself and help your children if you truly want the best for them.

It is easier and faster to be released from a toxic relationship when you perform spiritual cord cutting between you and your partner.  This method has been proven to be very powerful.  It will free you from whatever keeps you attached to the other person.  It will ease the pain of separation.  It will free you from constantly looking back at what you lost and what could have been if you did not leave.  It will relieve you from feeling responsible for the demise of the relationship and it will keep you from feeling guilty.  Feeling pity and feeling responsible for the toxic partner you have left will also be lessened and eventually erased because the strings he has attached on you will no longer be there to feed you wrong signals.  Your mind will be clearer and you will be more focused on building a new life without him.

Seeing danger from afar:

It is very true that you only see the real color of a person when you start living together for a certain period of time.  Natural tendencies and attitudes begin to show three months after living together.  The severity of bad attitudes and habits are full blown on the second year of staying together.  It is almost impossible to tell who a person is in the dating phase of a relationship but it is your responsibility to look for subtle tendencies and be wary of them.

During courtship and dating, one always puts his best foot forward to impress and attract the other.  When in the dating phase, be honest to yourself when you see some negative attitudes he has.  Spiritually shield yourself from the blinding hormones of sexual attraction and falling in love.  See the person for who he is and who he can become if he goes on with the strange things you noticed.  Love is not blind.  It has never been.  In fact, love enables you to see clearly beyond the human vision.  Love yourself enough so that you may see behind his “petty attitudes” that signal you: there is something wrong.

While there is still time and you are not in too deep into the relationship,  as soon as you spot a tendency for him to worsen with a habit, trait, addiction or attitude, get away already.  Who your potential partner is, is who he is. You cannot stop him from not being who he is by being his mate.  Stop fantasizing that you can change or improve him.  He may try to be “good” for a while in the early phase of your relationship but he will eventually revert to his old ways when things begin to get boring and problematic.

Whirlwind romances usually end up failing because there was not enough time to know each other deeper. Each partner gets shocked that the other is not who he really first appeared to be.

Give time before marrying or moving in with anyone.  This will give both of you ample allowances to adjust to one another.   You can discover more of each other so that when it’s time to live your lives as one, you have been emotionally briefed and prepared on how to deal with whatever worsening attitude one may develop or show as time goes by.

*All images courtesy of Google

What You Didn’t Know About Casual Sex

Our modern world is very open to casual sex.  Also known as free sex or liberated sex, it is the intimate physical union of two bodies without emotional attachments.   Any form of sexual coupling that is entered into, no matter how long or short which is without commitment, responsibility and most of all, love fall under this.

Casual sex comes in the following guises:

  1. One night stand (with someone you know or a stranger)
  2. Friends with benefits
  3. Sexual orgies
  4. Sexual experimentation and exploration
  5. Cyber Sex
  6. Porn Sex with masturbation
  7. Phone Sex Services
  8. Paid Actual Sex
  9. Random Hand Jobs and Oral Sex

Many engage in this form of sexual release primarily because they don’t want any “complication” which usually comes with having sex in a closed relationship. They see this as an easier way to enjoy sex without the litany of responsibilities and emotional, even financial baggage that come with being committed.  Males who are masters at this can even get away with unwanted pregnancies. 

The media, through movies, TV shows, soap operas,  comedy shows, advertisements and music depict sex as fun, free and accessible (because you can do it with anyone), romantic, healing and all the good things you were programmed to believe. The internet, even books and printed articles portray casual sex as easy, natural, stress-free, liberating and fun. Our society has been fed the information that this is a primal urge which man cannot control and so, he has to release it.  In turn, he becomes healthier, happier, focused and productive.   

People who freely engage in it usually believe that they are not hurting anyone with what they are doing because it is not forced or done without the other’s liking. Well, they are so wrong.  The word “hurt” is an understatement to all the negative effects of such acts.

Casual sex has never been as good and safe as we were made to believe.  The person’s spirit is greatly harmed.  When there is something sick or broken in one’s spirit, it will affect the physical body, including his social and psychological state.

Let me show you how this happens by first explaining what sex is in general.

We have been taught that sex is just the act of physical intercourse with another.  It may be done with an opposite or same gender partner.   It is first preceded by physical attraction, then arousal and ends with the act of coitus itself.  Well, sex is so much deeper than that.

Unseen Depths of the Sexual Act

When one has sex with another, not only do their bodies join.  Their souls or astral bodies unite as well. There is an absolute merging of the body, mind and spirit. There can never be a harmless random “casual” union because it involves a person’s whole being.  In the spirit or astral world, sex is seen as very sacred, not only because of the laws which religions have placed on it.  It is sacred because it involves the soul and spirit which are divine in nature. 

Even if you had sex just for 30 seconds, it still involved the union of each other’s auric fields. And it has long term effects that will transcend one’s generation and lifetime.

During the sexual union, both bodies emit a certain degree of light.  When this is emitted, souls in the spirit world, waiting to incarnate on earth eagerly watch.  When there is much love and pure devotion between the couple, they emit very bright beams of light.  These forms of coupling attract incarnating souls that are of higher awareness and spiritual development.  Children born out of this union are kind-hearted, balanced and more loving. On the other hand, partners who do intercourse without love, emit a grayish light.  These attract incarnating souls that are less experienced and have very low spiritual wisdom.  If pregnancy happens, children born will become very insecure, problematic and rebellious.

Remember that the aura of each person engaged in the sexual act is open to each other.  Contained in one’s aura are the person’s personality, habits, attitudes, talents and capabilities, spiritual debts and karma, blessings and curses, illnesses and diseases (including sickness that will still manifest later in life) and all sorts of emotional baggage.  When there is complete union of the auras, all that one has in his auric field melds with all that there is in hers. 

In a husband and wife relationship, it is a common occurrence that the woman easily senses if her husband is lying or has been unfaithful or is still in an extra-marital affair.  How do wives get this psychic ability?  

As a married couple, their auras are always united and her soul easily “sees” and “feels” into his aura.  Her conscious mind is not aware but her spirit mind is, and so she senses this infidelity.  Also, have you ever noticed that the longer a couple stays married (and sexually intimate), the more they seem to “look alike” even if they each have very different facial features?  It is the blending of the couple’s auras that makes people perceive such a resemblance.

An important factor that we should take note of is that the presence of love is powerful and significant in the safety of both souls during the sexual act itself. If the act is caused by love, this light energy serves as a force field against negative energies hovering around the couple’s space. Their auras are exclusively open only to each other and are penetrable only by the same level of light energies. 

If there is no love, and lust is the primal cause of the act, both persons are open for dark energies to enter both their fields.  Negative entities of this kind hook themselves deep into the aura of the chosen partner and will feed from the host indefinitely.  Lustful entities are highly attracted to this kind of lustful union.  The person chosen to be the prey of these types of “demons” will be more and more lustful and will crave for more similar unions.  That is why people who have tried casual sex once tend to have succeeding free sex events.  Also, they become afraid and unwilling to enter a committed relationship.  Or if they ever enter into a committed relationship, they will still be unfaithful or promiscuous after a while.

Another occurrence during intercourse is soul fragmentation.  This happens whether it be a union with or without love.  As soon as both bodies and soul separate, part of the soul body of one partner is taken by the other and viceversa.  This leaves both souls fragmented or both their souls are not whole anymore. Part has been taken by the other, leaving a feeling of incompleteness or insufficiency to the other.  If a major part has been taken away, this results to severe depression, emotional incapacity, psychological issues and withdrawal.

In deep loving relationships, soul fragmentation happens in chunks. Couples who love each other tend to give almost all of themselves and at the same time, want to take almost the whole being of the other. This emotion is put into spiritual action during the sexual union. They fragment each other’s soul and the exchange is done with full permission.   When a partner leaves, he/she takes with him/her that which was originally part of the other. That is why it takes years for one to truly and completely move on or get over the other partner if they get separated or one dies.  This gives credibility to the lines, “I feel so broken and empty now that she’s gone”, and, “He took my heart with him when he left”.

In a non-loving casual sex scenario, fragmentation happens but in very different ways.  The fragmentation occurs because one is only attracted to that part of the person.  The soul that is needy of that particular attribute takes it away from the other’s soul.  This leaves the other feeling something is missing and yet clueless about it.  The person fragmented or unwhole will feel emptiness, a sense of unfulfillment and unfaithfulness. He/she will constantly have multiple partners, because of the subconscious need to search for the soul’s missing parts.

It is also interesting to note that during the sexual union, both partners tend to feed on each other’s energy and the ingestion is very powerful.  It is usually the weaker one that feeds on the stronger.  Here is an example.  Have you ever noticed a steady couple with the man being years older from his mate and yet it seems like the woman looks almost as matured as him?  What caused this could be explained this way:  The man, being older, has a weaker life force as compared to his woman.  Every time they have sex, he tends to suck much of the woman’s youth energy.  This makes him physically stronger and potent and leaves the woman, partially depleted of her youthful energy and appearance. She, out of her love for him, was unaware yet shared part of her youth to him. And because the imparting of such energy was done in love, she will look older but she will not be sickly. 

This feeding also happens in cases where there is no love involved. It is a form of energy vampirism because the energy sucked from the sex partner was not given willingly by the other soul. For example, an old rich man pays for the sexual service of a young female.  This old man will feed off her youth during the opening of their auras without her conscious permission.  She has been vampired and preyed upon, by the old man, of energy she unwilling lost and this will result to her looking haggard and feeling weak. If this young lady goes on having paid sex with older men, she will, soon enough look old and will have all kinds of recurrent infections and diseases.

The case just mentioned is not far from rape or forced sex scenarios.  Victims of this kind of sexual union become depressed and sickly.  How did this come to be?  Let me explain in a simple scientific way.

When anyone or a female, for example, is forced into sex, her body undergoes severe stress.  This stress triggers an alarm from her hypothalamus (a tiny region at the base of the brain).  This electrical and chemical alarm signals her adrenal glands to secrete two stress hormones, adrenaline and cortisol. These hormones suppress the digestive, reproductive and immune systems to allow a focus of energy for a fight or flight reaction.  If the stress stays for too long, her body will begin to weaken because the three bodily systems are not processing normally.  Much acid will be produced from the digestive system and released into the blood stream.  This makes the body acidic and such an environment is host to all illnesses and diseases.  The immune system is continually placed on a halt, thereby making the body open and weak against sickness.  The reproductive system which is still suppressed, will exhibit symptoms of hormonal imbalances in the female and sex related problems.


The Aftermath of Casual Sex

Casual Sex is not shallow at all and the trail of devastation it brings to the persons involved is horrendous.

Since the astral bodies (spirit bodies) and auras of both partners unite during liberated sex, many traits, habits and vices that one has will be shared by the other.  Aside from those, all unpleasant energies and karma, including present and future illnesses will be passed to the other. Even unfavorable spirits attached to one will be received by the other. Curses will also be shared.

Casual sex is never motivated by love.   A negative feeling, like lust or fear is what fuels it. Since this act is empowered by a negative source, only the dark and bad in one’s aura is transferred to the other. Have you ever heard of a poor prostitute who became instantly rich after having sex with a rich man (Unless the rich man falls in love with the prostitute and takes her as his permanent mate)? No.  It is usually the rich man who will have financial difficulties after such acts.  The “richness” of the man was not shared to the prostitute because there were the negative energies of lust for the flesh (rich man) and fear to have no money (prostitute) in the act.  This allowed the energy of financial difficulty from the prostitute to transfer to the rich man.  (Please note that I have nothing against prostitutes.  I have deep respect for them as humans and for braving such difficulties and risks just to earn a living for their loved ones.)

In a loving sexual relationship, even the good talents, gifts, abilities and blessings can be passed to each other.  Love will allow the movement of positive baggage from one aura to another.

After intercourse, the person will begin experiencing whatever sense of reality the other one has.  Events and incidences commonly attracted by the other will now be magnetized by this person.  Even the other’s emotional state and vices will manifest in this person’s life.

Unexplained sadness, emptiness, confusion or guilt are the early symptoms one will experience after casual sex.  One’s way of thinking will begin to change and get distorted.  One will begin liking different things or activities. Habits will shift, including hobbies. Mood changes will be frequent, including feeling easily drained and sick. Even changing tastes and lifestyles will manifest in a short time.  Eventually, the deep effects of a fragmented soul will surface causing depression and hopelessness. In the end, one’s authentic self will be will be drowned and lost.

I recall a singer friend of mine several years ago.  I knew her as someone who didn’t drink alcoholic beverage.  She once had this infatuation with one of her admirers.  He was a middle aged business man who frequented the lounge she was working at.  He always looked haggard and he would always drink several bottles of beer before leaving.  He watched her perform almost every night.   She finally went to bed with him around three times for a span of two weeks.  I noticed subtle changes in her in their early casual sex activities.  She was harsher in her words and she began looking tired all the time.  What really called my attention was her suddenly fancy in beer drinking.

A close relative of mine is another example of the sharing of bad luck in casual sex.  He was a very successful business man.  He had a fine wife and a beautiful family.  All was well in his life until he entered into a new type of business which required him to buy-out his clients through wine and women.  This strategy was essential to win certain contracts.  He was earning millions with just a single deal.  Because he always had to up stay late away from his family, his wife started demanding that he just quit that kind of business.  He got fed up with her bickering and began sleeping with the high class prostitutes he used to win his clients with.  He eventually found one of them whom he chose to have regular sexual relations with. He was promiscuous for years. He spiraled into alcoholism.  I used to admire him for his refined, dignified and classy personality but he changed.  He turned into a vulgar and cheaply dressed gambler.  In as fast as 3 years, his businesses were shutting down one by one.  His children were going astray and his wife was always sick and depressed (She too was affected by the negative karma passed on to her by her husband).  He himself began having health problems.  They sold their properties one after the other just to be able to pay their bills.  In the end, he died very poor because of incurable diseases and he was not even able to afford any form of hospitalization.

This relative of mine shared the karmic load of the prostitutes he had casual sex with.  These women were poor and they had no choice but to sell their bodies to survive.  He absorbed these negativities in his aura.   He too experienced their poverty.  His aura was open as well to other negative entities that fed on him until his death.  Promiscuity, alcoholism, gambling and the extreme changes in his personality were obvious effects.

I would like to add that the detrimental effects of casual sex go beyond a person’s generation. The dark energies which the person inherited from his casual sex partner will stay with him and flourish even to his children and grand children. These opportunistic beings are transferred when one’s child is born.  They will stay and camp close to the child until the time comes that they succeed in gaining entrance to its aura through vices such as free sex, drugs, alcoholism, smoking, gaming addiction, pornography or other forms of destructive activities. Once they gain entrance, the vicious cycle of desolating the soul begins. If not healed, these negative entities will live within their bloodline for generations.

When I was analyzing this relative’s story, I discovered that his father was also a womanizer.  My relative was an only son.  He lost his promiscuous father early in life and he alone worked his way to financial success, until the dark entities his father unknowingly passed to him, found a way to gain entrance into his aura.  These dark beings set him up by using money.  Then they prepared more traps until he fell into free sex.  This let them gain entrance into his astral body and his life.

I just learned recently this relative’s son got separated from his wife because she caught him sleeping around. He also was doing drugs already.   This is a sign that the so called “demons” that ruined his grandfather and father had gained access into his life, as well.

This explains why we often notice that patterns are repeated through generations.  For example, a drunkard usually had an alcoholic parent.  A philandering wife had an unfaithful parent. A drug addict had drug addicts for parents.  A heavy chain smoker had a parent just like him, and so on.

It is essential to know that when you engage in casual sex, you not only receive whatever karma and negative baggage your partner has. You also inherit all other loads this partner received from her/his other casual sex partners. Just imagine all the ugly and heavy burdens of so many people you don’t even know, transferring and taking permanent residence in your aura and taking control of your life! You essentially become someone you don’t know or you don’t ever want to be.

Liberated sex creates soul ties which transcend time and space. When one dies, if he was not healed of the ruin he did to his astral body, all that he received from others through casual sex will follow and affect him in future incarnations.  The unlearned lessons or karma of others, now his as well, will be added to the hurdles he will have to master and overcome in succeeding lifetimes.

Healing the Self

For you to be totally healed from the destruction brought about by casual sex,  you have to undergo spiritual cord cutting, entity attachment removal and soul retrieval.  These are usually done for you by expert healers and shamans.  But what if you live in a place where you can’t find any of these types of people?  And what if you don’t have the money to avail of their services?  Will you be doomed and should you start feeling hopeless?

I was born a healer.  I knew how to perform spiritual techniques long before I knew how to read.  As the years passed, I was informed of my mission:  TO TEACH AND REMIND HUMANITY (of who they really are) AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, TO RE-EMPOWER THEM.

I am including, in this article, my personal and tested method on how you can cut the cords you have between the people you had casual sex with and how to detach from spirits that have deeply attached themselves on you, by yourself.  You have the power to do this.  Believe that you could and it will happen.

I will write separately on Soul Fragmentation and Soul Retrieval.  These are different topics and how to do this is different. Also, soul retrieval takes a while.  The soul parts you lost through casual sex, after soul retrieval, may return in as fast as 5 minutes and as long as you can imagine.  

I purposely prioritized the spiritual cord cutting and spirit attachment methods to immediately put a stop to the pain in your life. These should also be done to avoid further harm you may cause to any partner you currently have. 

Soul Retrieval must be done as an immediate follow up because you have to be whole again.  Soul Fragmentation means one’s soul has parts missing.  This results to restlessness, constantly looking for “happiness” in things and people, hopelessness, a feeling of loss and severe depression and discontentment.  People with fragmented souls don’t find fulfillment in any relationship.  They eventually develop addictions and vices to satisfy a need or yearning they cannot identify.

As I said,  you have the free gift to heal yourself.  But if you doubt, it would be best to seek the professional  help of a shaman or experienced healer.

(For people who live in the Philippines, please think several times before seeking help from albularyos, manggagamots and peddlers in Quiapo.  You may be doing more harm to yourself if you are not careful.  Make sure you get help from true Light Healers.)

If you have engaged in casual sex and wish to end the destructive cycle, begin by admitting to yourself that you made a mistake.  You need to determine the cause of an illness in order for you to administer the proper cure.

Once you sincerely realize the wrong you have done to your body, recognize the damage you have also inflicted in the life of the one you had casual sex with.

“A humble and penitent heart is one that heaven listens to.” This is what my Higher Self told me when I was still so little, and I never forget it.  Be humble enough to admit and confess your mistake through prayer. 

  1.  Call on your Godhead, your Higher Self and all your protective guardians to assist you in this releasing.  Ask them to surround you, protect you and empower you to accomplish this task.  Ask them to shut your space away from all lower forms of entities and energies.
  1.  Call on your other selves from other lifetimes who also engaged in the same activity and unite with them in one body.  See yourself merging with each one of them until you all become one.
  1.  Call on your guardian healers to surround you. 

  1.  Visualize cords stemming from your body and connecting to the body of the one/s you had casual sex with. This will include people in this lifetime and all other incarnations you had.  These cords are what still link your aura and astral body to others.  Ask your healing guardians to help you see all these cords. 
  2. 5.  Ask your Godhead or Higher Self to give you the most powerful cutting device you will be using to sever all these cords from your body.  Say thank you and proceed by cutting each cord one by one until all cords have been cut.
  1.  See yourself free from the entanglements from these people and ask your healing guardians to assist you in sealing off the parts from which you cut the cords.  Seal these “wounds” with forgiveness and love.  If you don’t seal each part properly, these chords will grow back and re-attach to the same person again, so don’t be in a hurry in sealing.
  1.  After you have sealed your side, send your sincerest apologies to the ones you had casual sex with.  Send forgiveness as well, for the damage they have caused you.  Then say “I love you,” (and mean it).  Ask your healing guardians to help you seal their end of their severed cord with love.  This should be done so that they won’t attach themselves to other people.

8.   Now that you have been freed, ask your protective guardians to find all hiding and deeply latched negative energies and entities in your aura and astral body/soul.  Ask them to gently escort these entities away from your energy field and away from your space. Your guardians will know where to send them. Bid these entities goodbye and send them forgiveness, love and an honest from the heart, thank you.  Wait!  You must be wondering why you should be nice to these “demons” and worse, send them a sincere “thank you”. You must realize that these entities have played a crucial role in helping you learn more about life and pain. Their inflictions helped you gain strength in ways we will only realize in some other time.  They, no matter how dark, deserve our gratitude.  Never gloat at them or say anything damaging or hurting to them.  Instead, have mercy on them and send them healing so that they may find the way back to the light.  Learn to treat others the way you want to be treated when you have done something wrong. Remember that we learn from making mistakes and experiencing pain. So be nice.

  1.  Next, ask your healers to begin healing the deep wounds these entities caused you.  Ask them to energize you so that you look all brand new and shiny. 
  1.  With the help of your protectors, seal your aura, your astral body and physical body so that such entities will never be able to enter again.  Use a protective shield of your liking and program it with whatever you wish it to do. Say thank you and I love you to your shield.  These words will strengthen it further.
  1.  Lastly, look at all your guardians and thank them all so much for the assistance, healing and love they sent you.  Do the same with your Godhead and your Higher Self.  End your session by telling them and yourself that you will now be very cautious and protective of your physical and spiritual bodies.  Then, mean it.

These cord cutting and healing sessions are a very exhausting and laborious task.  Do it when you are not tired and when you are in a good mood. Don’t be in a hurry when you are in the process. This work is only for cutting the connections with other people and healing some of the damages.  Again, a different healing session is needed for Soul Retrieval. 

(For questions or assistance, you can email me : )

In closing, remember that your body, no matter how imperfect, is sacred.  It is where your divine soul resides. Treat your body with love and respect.  After all, it is the only one that you can really call yours in this life. If you want to be loved the right way, start by loving yourself, your body, the right way. When you do this, you will attract the same energy. You will find the kind of love you have always wanted.

Only give yourself (in sex) to someone you are willing to share your whole life with.  Reserve your body for someone you will love enough, to make you willing to accept all that this person can bring into your life: good or bad.  It is only love that can heal the hurts, pains and burdens another has.

RememberNever have sex with someone you don’t want to  become.

*All images courtesy of Google